Isabel Julie Monteiro Bühlmeier

I find that being finding awkwardness and imperfection is difficult right now. Being constantly watched, observed, and recorded in a culture that praises perfect aesthetics leaves very little room for awkward self-discovery. Making mistakes feels like it has higher stakes because our very existence has become more publicized. The conflict that manifests within awkwardness is important for gaining a sense of self.

I was first intrigued by awkwardness as a concept when watching Guillermo del Toro's 2025 adaptation of Frankenstein. The creature made me think how people can be perceived as awkward simply by contrasting those around them in appearance and perspective. The interactions he had contrasted with Victor because the creatures’ actions contrasted how his creator viewed him resulting in awkwardness and then violence from Victor towards his creation. Contrastingly, the creature's interactions with Elizabeth were not awkward as her perception of the creature being inherently good as a newly born soul matched his gentle actions. Moreover, he has such a deep longing to belong and be human despite his rejection, that he seeks the ultimate comfort in death—the missing piece confirming that he is human after all.

Then, I explored the idea of growth within awkwardness. Not all growth in nature, for example, is considered beautiful—even when completed. Many people see weeds, lichens, and fungi as ugly and rip them out—viewing them as a visual nuisance.

I then combine these ideas with being an adolescent girl—a very literal embodiment of awkwardness—to portray the awkwardness of growth and development in the world. I believe that women often feel particularly awkward when experiencing adolescence because there is a profound contrast in expectation between being a woman and a girl. In addition, there is significant pressure of conformity within expected gender norms that may be contrasted by the development of personal values and beliefs. This, in particular, is what leads to the overarching idea of awkwardness I would like to explore: the inevitability of growth as an individual into an environment that already has expectations of you. There will be an eventual clash of identity and societal norms as one learns your own identity—and in that lies awkwardness.

To visually represent this idea within a fashion collection, I first worked within a paper doll format: using cut up outlines of individual garments and then placing them together to create a fool look. I first used some of my previous designs from other collections to have an idea of how this may look within my own visual identity. I wasn’t sure how big to make them so some of the clothes were out of proportion. Some were too big or too small and thus making the other seem more exaggerated

I continued with this idea of exaggeration of proportion with some drawings of my own. I drew and cut out the individual pieces and uploaded them to my computer to play with their proportions.

I use materials with strong established associations such as argyle is typically used for sweaters, striped cotton is usually used for a standard shirt or blouse, etc. I then reinterpret them in new ways. For example: argyle patterns from old sweaters for a dress, and striped cotton meant for a dress shirt used to make a long dress instead. These elements combine to remind the audience of the contrast between expectation and interpretation.

I then drape using the same principle: to reinterpret and experiment with proportions in relation to the body to create my final silhouettes.